Hobby: Debauchery
by Reiven
Summary: Twins/Tamaki. The twins are bored and decide in a moment of sheer brilliance to have their way with their adorably flaky king. In other words: hot threesome that gives Kyouya…plans of his own.


_Standard disclaimer applies._

**Authoress**: Reiven  
**Characters**: Tamaki, Hikaru, Kaoru and Kyouya.  
**Classification**: Yaoi. Hikaru/Tamaki/Kaoru and Kyouya/Tamaki.  
**Notes**: Written for quaedam on Fic on Demand on Livejournal.  
**Warning**: Suggestive tones between the four boys.  
**Summary**: The twins are bored and decide in a moment of sheer brilliance to do what they will with their adorably flaky king. In other words; hot threesome that gives Kyouya…plans of his own.

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**Hobby: Debauchery  
**_By Reiven_

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Suoh Tamaki had always been the kind of friend that everyone would want backing them up. He never went back on his word, always staying loyal to the promises he made. He never pondered over the 'what if's' and 'maybe's'; what if he hadn't taken his grandmother up on her offer? What if he never left his mother to come to Japan? What if he'd never met Kyouya? Maybe his life would have been completely different had he continued his life in France. Maybe he would have turned out to be a different person. Maybe inviting the twins to join the Host Club was not such a good idea on his part…

"Tono."

"Tono."

"You said there would be fun and excitement involved--"

"--That our lives would be greatly enriched when we joined the Club."

"Where is the fun?"

"And the excitement?"

"We don't know about you, but looking at you, having you look at us then throwing our glances to Hunny-sempai and Mori-sempai only to have our looks returned--"

"--is not our idea of excitement."

"We want drama."

"We want ogling eyes and drool."

"We want something to do because…"

"We're boooooooooooooooored!" both finished simultaneously, eyes fixed firmly on the exasperated form of Tamaki, spread out ungracefully on the sofa in front of them. He had one arm thrown casually over his eyes, lips set to a firm, straight line as he desperately wished away the oncoming headache and the cause. More appropriately, _causes_.

"Tono!"

"Okay! Okay! Fine," Tamaki huffed. He was usually a very patient person, but now found his patience stretched to the limit. "Why don't you…err…help Kyouya with whatever he's…doing?" he trailed off suddenly, allowing his eyes to scan around the room, only to find it deserted. The spot where he swore Kyouya had been sitting at just a few second ago was vacated. Even Mori-sempai and Hunny-sempai seemed to be missing.

Unbeknownst to him, Hikaru and Kaoru, following his eyes for a moment, had stopped as their gazes locked with each other. There was a slight menacing gleam twinkling in the corner of their eyes as proverbial light bulbs went off over their heads.

"It's okay, Tono," Hikaru muttered, taking a step forward until he was looming over the side of the three-seater sofa Tamaki was spread out on. His hands planted casually on his hips as Kaoru came up on the right, at the edge of the sofa standing by the top of Tamaki's head; his hair falling over his eyes as he leaned down slightly, looking Tamaki straight in the eye though upside-down.

"We've thought of something fun to do," Kaoru explained, hand reaching down to tilt Tamaki's chin upwards until his forehead nearly touched Kaoru's chin. He spoke in a husky tone that rang of unmistakable amusement as Tamaki's eyes took on a look of bemuse.

"And it wouldn't be that much fun with too many people watching," Hikaru added, planting his knee down on either side of Tamaki's waist until he was crouching over the slender teen, his crotch rubbing up against the front of Tamaki's thigh, causing a blush to spread across his pale cheeks.

"W-what are you two doing?" stuttering out his question, Tamaki moved to sit up, but a hand on his chest pushed him gently but firmly onto his back. This time though, instead of feeling the expensive, silk clad pillow cushioning his head, he felt Kaoru equally soft thigh supporting the back of his head.

"Why, testing out our methods of conduct of course. We were coerced into joining this Host Club, weren't we? The least we could do was test out the quality of our hosting before putting it to use."

"I understand that, but--"

"Shush, Tono," said Kaoru, placing a finger over Tamaki's lips to silence him. "We know what we're doing. After all, when you decided that you _must _have us join the club, you surely had some trust in our capabilities, our…gift in pleasing the customers you might say."

"I do, it's just…"

"Come on, Tono. Live a little."

By this time, Hikaru was sliding so much closer to Tamaki that he could feel the heat of his breath wash over his face with every uttered word. He smelled like pepper and cinnamon, as opposed to Kaoru, whose minty aroma invaded Tamaki's nostrils. At this moment, all outside sounds became muffled to Tamaki's ears as he came to the sudden and brilliant deduction. He knew how to tell the twins apart…given that he would have to be able to come close enough to sniff them whenever he had the urge to do so, of course.

"Why the sudden quiet, Tono?"

Snapping out of his reverie, Tamaki shifted his eyes up, meeting Kaoru's kind look.

"I was just…thinking."

"About what?"

Tamaki tinkered with the idea of telling him about his sure-win method in telling them apart, but eventually decided otherwise. They would surely find away to change their smell if that happened. No, this would be his little secret.

"Nothing in particular," he answered, coming to the realization that laying on his back with his head on Kaoru's thigh was not such a bad position to be in and had it not been for Hikaru menacing form looming over him, a sign that something sinister was imminent, he would even go as far as to say that it was comfortable.

"Do you want to play a game, Tono?" Hikaru asked. "It's a new one we just came up with. It's a lot of fun too."

Though he knew better than to trust the twins whenever they had _'something fun' _in mind, he nodded his head nonetheless. However, he found himself reconsidering his decision soon after when he felt and heard the sound of a zip being opened.

"I don't think--" he began, but found his words silenced when a pair of lips lowered down onto his. His eyes flew open, but the only thing he could see was a tiff of auburn hair and the ceiling. Judging by the fact that he could still feel the button of his pants being undone, this could only mean that the lips currently attached to his own belonged to Kaoru. He decided at that moment that maybe Kaoru's lips were not such a bad place to be attached to, really.

He felt a flutter in the pit of his stomach when Hikaru's cold hands came in contact with him, feeling the soothing strokes as his fingers brushed across the length of him. He wanted to say that Hikaru had very soft hands, but by this time Kaoru's tongue had managed to penetrate his still closed lips and was now roaming free deep within his mouth. The only sound that emerged was a muffled groan. It seemed like an eternity before Kaoru broke the kiss, pulling back slightly though his palm was still cupping Tamaki's cheek.

Tamaki found himself caught between wanting to throw Hikaru off him, jump to his feet and run around Ouran a few times until he found Kyouya and wanting Kaoru to kiss him again while Hikaru moved onto second base and finally did something useful with that mouth of his.

"Did you like that, Tono?" he heard Kaoru inquire, to which he replied with a grunted _'yes'_. "Do you want to do it again?" he added, just as Hikaru's voice interjected;

"Want to move onto the most exciting part?"

Tamaki took a moment to wonder whether telekinesis was one of the powers that had been passed onto the twins, but he agreed anyway. After all, never let it be said that Suoh Tamaki, son of the esteemed chairman of Ouran High School, ever did things half way.

He watched with half interest as Kaoru's face lowered and he found his lips once again locked in a passionate kiss with Kaoru. He moaned slightly, the pleasure building up a flurry in his stomach. But soon, the feeling became almost unbearable when he felt the length of him being engulfed by Hikaru's mouth; his playful tongue licking the tip. Tamaki could almost feel the smile playing at his lips as the twinkle of mischief sparkled behind his irises.

Biting back a moan, he tilted his head back slightly, but that move only burrowed his head deeper into the middle of Kaoru's thighs, closer to his--

"Tono?"

Tamaki snapped his eyes open, only now realising that Kaoru had pulled away and Hikaru had stopped his licking. Both were now hovering over him with a slightly worried expression on their faces.

"Are you okay?" They asked.

Tamaki didn't answer. Was he okay? Was he okay with the fact was he was currently bring defiled by a pair of twins that, only with the support of his never-give-up attitude, he'd managed to talk into joining the club? Was he okay with the fact that he was the senior and should be the level headed one, not the one desperately craving Kaoru's lips upon his own, or that Hikaru not stop whatever he was doing for the sole reason that he was very good at doing it? Was he okay with the fact that he was doing something that was quite possibly immoral with two people that were obviously not Kyouya? More importantly, was he okay with the fact that--

"Oh, to hell with it!" he uttered suddenly, throwing an arm out and grabbing Hikaru by the side of his head before pulling his lips onto Tamaki's. Both of them seemed slightly startled by this sudden action. But the shock passed as quickly as it came. Soon, Tamaki found that the fluttering in his stomach had begun again, but it wasn't he was kissing Hikaru (who was unmistakably kissing him back) but because the tickling sensation near his left ear where Kaoru's fringe was brushing up against his neck, and feeling the light, feathery kisses the younger twin was tracing across his shoulder. He didn't know when exactly his jacket was discarded to the floor, or when two other pairs joined it. He didn't notice the buttons of his white shirt being undone at the top and the collar being pulled down, baring his broad shoulders. The only thing he noticed was the way Kaoru's lips seemed to evoke butterflies inside his gut and the way Hikaru's educated tongue trailed down his neck and over his collarbone as his hands massaged Tamaki's crotch.

Tamaki groaned, grabbing a handful of hair and pulling Hikaru's head up where he caught his lips with his own.

The three boys, lost in the aroma of pleasure, didn't notice the door creaking upon and when Kyouya walked in. His trusty notebook clutched in his hands as he stood unmoving by the door. His eyes, beneath the shine reflected in the lenses of his glasses, seemed to be roaming over the sight. For a moment, his face remained impassive, not betraying any emotion he was currently feeling. But soon, a smile began tugging at the side of his lips as he continued to watch. He soon caught himself and with a mutter of, "Interesting," wrote down an unseen passage in his notebook and left without a glance back. He didn't see it when the clothes were lost or when the muffled moans turned into much louder, aroused whimpers and groans. He shut the door behind him and leaned with his back against the wooden door just as a last cry rang.

Pushing his glasses higher up his nose, the smile still noticeable on his face he walked away, not wanting to be there when the pleasure ended and the explanations would begin, if there was going to be any explaining at all. And so he left without another word or another look back. He did not know, nor did he want to know what happened from then after. All he knew was that he'd gotten his information for the day, and in the process, learned more about Tamaki. This being said, he came to the ultimate conclusion that the next time Tamaki came by, they'd have more _'fun' _things to do on the kotatsu besides drinking tea and discussing possible tourist sites in Japan.

And with that, Ouran High School bid a warm welcome to the Host Club and its idiosyncratic hosts.

**The end.

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Was that lame? Was it cheesy. Just so you know, this is my first time writing smut--I think that was it anyway--(Is there too little? Too much? Not descriptive enough? To lame/cheesy/clichéd? Was the plot (or complete lack thereof) okay? I have to admit, the entire thing revolved around that one situation in which the twins are bored). I have to admit, the closest think I ever came to the 'dangerous' side that is yaoi, it was merely…okay, so I never ventured anywhere near there, writing-wise, in all my yaoi loving years. As you can tell, I'm feeling particularly nervous right now. Should I go and dunk my head in the toilet and never ever spare even a passing glance at, as it might be known: It-that-attempts-to-pass-it-self-off-as-smut Or was it 'okay'? Because I'd take 'okay' and give it its own spot on the mantel.

Oh, and I didn't know whether you wanted any Kyo/Tama but I just had to add it in anyway. If you did, then, yay. If you didn't, then…err…sorry.


End file.
